Fear is the Mind Killer
Watch and wait has been the mantra for months. Ever since we did my scan last fall and did stereotactic radio surgery. I had multiple metastases show up in my brain. So many, no one is counting how many. Just multiple. The good news has been they had mostly remained stable since they showed up. Another on pops up here or there. One grows a millimeter, one shrinks a millimeter, others just sit. Today’s MRI reading wasn’t...
June, Hey June, Don’t Let Me Down
I have been dreading and looking forward to June. My life is an exciting bunch of good and bad. June meant our big Lake Powell trip that we have been planning since last year. It has been a list item for me, I live in Utah and have somehow never been to Lake Powell. Mike loves Lake Powell and he has been aching to go for ages and it has just never been in the cards since it is a far drive and we have wanted to spend a decent amount of...
Chemo, Fifi on the Loose, Decisions to be Made
In the battle of pain, lately it has been pain 10, Mandi 0. My palliative care doctor and I mulled over the fact that we had increased my time release medication and my pain was still increasing. It was like the increase had no impact. I guess sometimes your body will just become accustomed to a pain medication and it doesn’t help much, even if you increase the dosage. So she opted to change my time release medication from...
Support is About Showing Up
This is a post by my friend. I thought it would be interesting to get a friend’s perspective on what it is like to live with a friend with stage IV breast cancer anther recommendations on offering support in this tough situation. My friend likes swear words (her mouthy-tude is one of the reasons we love her). My friend is dying. Hopefully not tomorrow or even this year. But someday, the insidious disease that is eating away at...
Tumor Markers are Not My Friend
I didn’t feel like going up and getting my tumor markers before my appointment and now I wish I had. a 30 point jump this last go is a good spike (It has been creeping 10 points or so and now a big one). We added a new marker to watch, but have nothing to compare it to. Maybe I should get an award for an all time high in cancer activity in my body. Not sure I want to stand on stage for this one. “I would like to that the...
3 More Weeks, Another Chemo
The last bit has been mostly uneventful as far as cancer life goes. I have been tired, cranky, in pain and the usual bit – but have a bit of a break before my next MRI and time before we do another PET-CT. For now we just wait, hope that nothing sneaky is growing and sort of sift through what is “next” in the treatment plan as we are teetering on the brink of change. I am really lacking in the creative title...