When I look back at the past three years I try to bury the bad things and find the good things. I keep trying to stick cancer under a rock and keep it there, sometimes it manages to creep out (maybe I need a bigger rock), but I stuff it right back under there when I can.
Days like today cancer sneaks out from under that rock. Today is the anniversary of the day of my diagnosis. I won’t ever forget the day I was diagnosed, you just can’t… and now it is tied to the holidays and my birthday.
This year’s anniversary of is admittedly easier than last year. Last year I couldn’t find the right coping technique so I threw my energy into Operation Mandi’s Birthday Wish (which was the right coping technique, doing something for others certainly finds warm happy feelings to replace the sad dark ones).
Painting with my lovely friends
This year I didn’t quite have the time or energy for that undertaking, so I turned in a bit more. What I found is that the past three years have made me richer beyond my imagination. What makes me so rich is the amazing people in my life. The ones that held my hand through treatment, brought us dinner, sent us cards, asked us how we were doing, came over and watched Despicable Me with me (over and over and over and over and over, and now there is Despicable Me 2 people…) and just were there in every way that they could be.
My favorite husband (it may be Utah, I only have one)
There are all of the people who commented on my blog. Everyone who offered me a random pick-me-up when I let myself get down. The wonderful emails. My amazing staff, coworkers and bosses. My awesome immediate family and wonderful gigantic extended family.
I met so many wonderful women through the hospital, online, groups, friends of friends… I wouldn’t trade my breast cancer friends for anything in the universe. You need people that you can make terrible lack-of-boob jokes with and who understand the nuances of this kind of life. I love them all.
There is also my husband. He is the best. <3
So there you go. My life is rich. I love you people. Thanks for the last 3 years, the previous (almost 34, not until tomorrow…) years, and to many many more..
